§ ¶once upon a time i ate a goat.

certain questions never answered. happiness and fufillment are concepts. i live in ideals, wrapped in mistakes.

i quote from those who speak more eloquently than i.

I forget all the things I tell myself to remember.

i question if this world will ever be the way i hope it will.

and even if it was, doubt i'd be happy.

i'm happy all the time, except when i'm not.

I worry like water flows.

i want to be in a calm lake.

with ducks.

who eat a variety of bakery products.

-p2

§ ¶Success is a foreign country to me

Recently there’s been a very strange debate going on, but people kept twisting my words, and it got rather annoying.  Eventually, there was a comment long enough that it needed to be broken down and replied to bit-by-bit

Have you been succesful [sic] enough to have relationships that last 3-5 years, having a job as an egyptologist, an artist and a musician all in one, and getting to do what you love for the rest of your life?

No, actually.  I haven’t lived long enough to have a relationship last that long, really; I’m in college.  Though not impossible, for me to have that kind of success at this point would be very difficult.  However, I fully plan on doing something I love for the rest of my life.  Right now, the plan is to write philosophy.  Who knows what it will be by the time I leave this institution; it’s nothing for me to worry about now.

And getting to do those things because you work hard and don't come from a rich family that gets their grades bought for their children, instead of their children being able to learn, but no. [sic] They buy their kids by getting them anything they want, but theirs no love involved.

Now, I’m really not sure where this is coming from.  I think it’s some sort of try to get a tug at the heartstrings, also with the implication that I am one of these kids; however, it falls very rhetorically flat, coming off as simply throwing something out there that doesn’t belong.  That’s not to say that the kind of family you describe is not the best to be raised in.  You worked hard for where you are; that’s good.  I myself also have worked, am working, and will continue to work hard; I am not from one of the families described above. 

I'm lucky to be from a family that loves me, and thats [sic] why I am successful. Being able to play any instrument I pick up and having no knowledge of that instrument at all, being in a band and playing awesome leads and rythym [sic] guitar, and having fun. Also, being able to decipher Egyptian heiroglyphs [sic], and being fluent at all these things since I was 8 years old. That is success.

Success is not inherent when a family loves you, however much of a better environment it may be.  The reader’s own examples of this will do much better than anything I could conjure up.  It’s good that your family loves you – mine loves me, too – but it’s not so black and white as you say.  Being able to pick up musical instruments like that is a true gift; my father had a friend who had that sort of talent.  My uncle’s band was in town, and there was a steel guitarist in the band, and he let Danny fool around with it.  In half an hour, he was playing it better than the guy in the band.  That’s something precious, not something to be squandered; with talent like that comes a great responsibility.  The ability to decipher hieroglyphs is neat.  I myself (and pardon this bit of boasting, I don’t mean to; it is but to prove a point) am able to read both Latin and Ancient Greek; I’ll be taking a year’s worth of German next semester, and plan on taking a year of Chinese this summer.  All these, although I do believe I have a greater talent for language than some, are nothing more than learned.  Being able to do it since you were eight is certainly no small feat – and congratulations are in order – but it’s not impossible.  Honestly (and this is planning very far ahead), I plan on teaching my kids both English and Chinese, depending on what the world is like in ten or twenty years.  But, saying that what you describe is success, it makes it sound like you haven’t really accomplished anything since you were eight.  Is that true success, then?  Is not taking your natural, inborn talents and accomplishing something great with them success?

Being in a relationship, even longterm ones does not mean your [sic] successful. You dont [sic] have to be in a relationship to be successful. I learned that through tons of experience. I don't need to depend on anyone to take care of me, to fight with, and to be hurt over and over again. I'm through with that.

Of course a relationship does not equate success; and anyone who says otherwise is selling something.  I won’t address your thoughts in the last two sentences, because I don’t feel that I myself have enough experience to agree or disagree; however, I can’t say I like them.  There is something that touches me as sad, and perhaps someone more experienced than I can point out what it is, exactly.  It sounds, though, like all the success you were talking about in relationships hasn’t paid off; you sound like you’re alone, and want to stay that way because those relationships, although long, were unhealthy.  Now, this is pure speculation: I only have what little information you’ve given.  But, I wouldn’t say length of a relationship determines its success.  Maybe you’ve made that distinction, but it wasn’t clear here.  Still, something about those last two sentences saddens me.

And, If this site is'nt [sic] about how women or girls suck, then it should'nt [sic] be called "Girls Suck."

Well, it is about how girls suck; which is not to say its counterpart isn’t the case.  As someone pointed out earlier, it’s a marvel the human race persists, after all the elaborate dances both sexes have to go through to even be near the same page with one another.  The genders are very different; but difference isn’t bad.  Those differences may cause conflict from time to time, but they are to be embraced as amazing consequences of nature.  This site is supposed to be, on the whole, lighthearted; sure, there’s an occasional post that’s quite a downer, but that’s not what most of it is.  If someone wanted to make a site about the inferiority of women, chances are it wouldn’t be called something as blithe or jocund as “Girls Suck.”  Also, see this entry.

[Part omitted because there’s too much history to explain, and it would confuse matters.]

Every piece of good advice that I have taken has led to good things. That is a big part of my success. Just remember, no one is forcing you to take that advice.

If “good advice” led one to bad ends, it would not be such good advice, no?

It's my success, but I know that not everyone can play the guitar , [sic] or can decipher heiroglyphs [sic], or draw a masterpiece [sic] in five minutes, but people can be successful when they try, and find something that they are good at. Success does'nt [sic] get sold at stores. It's something that you have to work hard at.

You’re right, not everyone can play the guitar or decipher hieroglyphs.  People have different natural talents.  I would bet there are some things you could never learn to do that come naturally to some; for instance, listen to some good folk music: could you ever learn to play mandolin like Chris Thile from Nickel Creek?  I know I’ll never be able to, no matter how much I practice; my neurons simply don’t fire fast enough to be able to move my fingers as fast as he can.  However, I would argue that very few could draw a masterpiece in five minutes.  For it to be a masterpiece, it must, as the word would imply, stand head and shoulders above all the other works of the artist.  Now, it’s possible for someone to simply sit down and plop something down, and have it be simply amazing, with nothing to add.  But, I imagine that happens very few times to very few people; most art, and most masterpieces, take a very long time to create.  Maybe you can simply plop them out; but you’ll have to pardon my skepticism.  As far as your ideas concerning success – trite at best – I’d keep to deciphering hieroglyphs and stay away from waxing philosophical about the quintessence of success.

 

Zhuangzi, in a patched gown of coarse cloth and shoes tied up with string, was passing the King of Wei.

            ‘How low you have sunk, sir!’ said the King.

            ‘It’s poverty, it isn’t sinking low.  A man having the Way and the Power but being unable to act on them, that’s sinking low.’

~Zhuangzi, chapter 32, trans. A. C. Graham

§ ¶Annoyance

I was home for Thanksgiving, and, as is to be expected, I went out with friends on several occasions during the short break, having not seen them in a significant amount of time.  On Saturday night, I took two girls out, separately.  When I went out the second time, my dad calls to me, "Be safe!"  I respond with "The roads are fine now, don't sweat it," but I knew exactly what he meant.  It really bothered me.  For one thing, he knows I'm a virgin, and no, you don't have to have sex to get anything; but I know both of these girls really well.  One was a very close friend for the last two years of high school (hence my wanting to see her again; this was also the one he made that remark about).  Point is: they're both squeeky clean.

Now, granted, I did end up making out with both of them.  But, for one thing, he didn't nor does he need to know that; it's none of his business.  And for another, he has no right to say anything like that to me; I felt degraded, and I felt that my friend was, too.  Yes, we are getting together; but up until three or four weeks ago, we could get together for four hours and would never have been doing something like making out.  Now, the reason for that is simple: she had a boyfriend.  We had (have) been attracted to each other for the past two and a half years.  But, either I was in a relationship, or she was, or, as sometimes happened, both of us would be.  So, it just didn't work out.  Now, who knows where it'll end up going; I'm going to simply keep it open-ended and not worry about it right now.  I know for sure that I'm not interested in a relationship right now, though, and I doubt she is, either.  Why?  Well, this had been her on-and-off boyfriend for a number of years, and so simply plunging into another relationship seems somewhat silly, at least to me.

Back to my point: that comment my father made was really obnoxious.  Yick.  There should be some sort of rule.

-p5

§ ¶It might have been a feint

"I've only had two serious relationships.  The last boy's name was, ironically, yours as well."

Does the ironically not imply that she's interested?  Apparently, the answer is "no".  Girls suck.

-p5

§ ¶You called to tell me that?!

Sometimes things can change between two people. You think things are getting comfortable and you're enjoying each other's company.

But then you get a phonecall at 4 in the morning when you're trying to sleep because you have to be up to work in 2 hours, about how not only is she drunk-dialing you, but she happened to go out to a strip club, with her neighbors of all people. Oh she almost forgot, she felt up another girl for the first time.

And it makes you blink your still sleepy eyes and wonder just what in the fucking christ is going on here. I'm not entirely sure, but damnit am I tired now. I also just realized something, it reminds me of the time my first 'true' love phone me up during one of our short 'breaks'. During which time she informed me that not only had she hung out with some guy, that she saw his dick, oh and by the way she told me it was bigger than mine. It just makes you wonder, why even call!?

p3

§ ¶Box of chocolates plus one

Life is like one, big puzzle.  Sometimes the pieces simply fall together on their own volition.  Other times, they don't come together themselves, so they need guidance.  But you can never force pieces together that don't fit.  Force doesn't work, only guidance.  If pieces don't fit together - if the li isn't right, in Confucian terms - then they simply don't, and there's no way to make them fit: you can't change their shape.

What's life a puzzle of?  Surprisingly, it's a Mario game, in three levels.  The giant octopus is till a pain in the ass.

-p5

§ ¶Left Foot Right Foot

At the bar last night, girl said "sup" as I was walking through the bar, I said "sup?" and kept walking, figuring she was just being polite
Then my roommate showed up, she cornered him and laid into him about how I was avoiding her and how I completely ignored the fact that she winked at me. I guess she really went off on him. He sees me later and relays this information, and I look around for her, and she's gone
So I have a few more beers and chill out in a chair by the jukebox.

She shows up, nearly walks by without seeing me, and I pipe up with "Don't say hi or anything..." We chat for about 30 seconds, then she goes home.

WTF

-p4

§ ¶Just, y'know, so we're on the same page

You know when you don't want a relationship, and you know that this other person doesn't want a relationship, but you both still think the other is an awesome person, and want to hang out alot, and maybe do whatever, just nothing romantic, and they feel they should say (rightly, I think, too) that they don't want a relationship, just to make sure the grounds are clear?  Them saying that?

That still sucks.

-p5

§ ¶I really like jigsaw puzzles

Saturday night was awesome.  Sometimes things just fall right into place and everything clicks.  Now I need to be able to follow through, and that might prove to be the hard part....

-p5

§ ¶Totally applicable to relationships

Okay, what the hell is it with girls who are totally flirty with me who have boyfriends?  Seriously, every time I'm like, "Oh, yes, this girl is totally into me," I find out she has a boyfriend; what's more, their boyfriend does not go to this school.  Ever.  I'll illustrate: this girl kitty-corner from my room asks me to go camping with her; the implication is that we would be alone.  What does she tell me days later?  Oh, she has a boyfriend in Connecticut.  And what happens last night?  She asks me to go to New York with her.  That is 14 hours away by train.  That is not a short trip.  What the hell is going on?  Also, this other girl in a class section seems interested.  I'm running an ounce late, come into the classroom, and plop down in the nearest seat, which is next to her, and she greets me with an enthusiastic "Hey!"  I did not expect anyone to be that psyched about seeing me.  Then, one thing leads to another, and we decide to work out our papers together for this class.  All night we enjoy ourselves (there's no doubt she's a great girl, and so's the one who invited me to New York), and we're laughing, and occasionally, when we're laughing, she gives me these eyes that totally say "I like you."  I'd swear up and down that's what they're saying.  And when I get back to my dorm, what do I find out but that she is, indeed, taking; and the kid is, indeed, though not a day or more away, a hefty couple, three hours away.  This seems so unfair.

I guess I'll just have to not worry about their boyfriends.  "And what," as a friend said to me in reference to this problem, "does your boyfriend have to do with me?"  I'm really torn with this.  I have three friends who're in long-distance relationships, and I want nothing but success for them.  And I'd feel really kinda mucky actually taking one of these girls away from their boyfriends.  But, honestly; we just started college.  I think we should be focusing on here, and not hanging onto what's past.  But, again, I'm torn myself, because of my friends.  Plus, stealing girls just doesn't ring right with my ethics bells.  Oh, well.  Come what may, I suppose.  After all, I've also been trying out this whole philosophy of not really worrying about girls at all.  It's the whole Daoist "doing nothing" thing.  When you do nothing, you left nothing undone.

-p5

§ ¶Captain Planet, He's our hero..

Think about your life if you were still with your first girlfriend...

I think I'd be working at a Dennys.

-p2

§ ¶Zombie Protitute

She did a little dance around the ideas giving them praise. Didn't understand a word, couldn't act her age.

It is so difficult to think. It's even harder to do it clearly.

-p2

§ ¶Things I don't remember

A certain sort of someone will walk in or out and around your head.

talking about nothing, won't remember what they said.

-p2

§ ¶Videogames are fun

You can't play relationships like Super Mario. You can't always expect to hop over spikes, stomp a few turtles, throw a giant lizard into some lava and then you finally get the girl. Most relationships are really more like Galaga, just the same stupid endless shit over and over until you either lose or realize you're bored with the cheap stupid shit the game keeps throwing at you and move on to something better.

p3

§ ¶i fart love.

it is disgusting how little we understand about our world. It is disgusting that there are dui attorneys when people all over the world cannot eat.

we are a nation of adult infants.

i love infants. they smell awesome.

-p2

§ ¶Not quite natural

I had the creepiest fucking nightmare last night.  I was back in my bedroom at home, trying to go to sleep, and then there was a presence in there.  It was the person, but they were really damned tall, with long, long arms and long legs.  It wasn't quite proportional; the torso was a bit short, I think, for the arms and legs to be that long.  And its face looked just a little bit like my mom, but different enough that it was scary.  Then it sat down on my bed and grinned at me with a full set of teeth.  Then there was another one.  I don't know how I knew, but I knew that these two were very, very bad.  And I couldn't really fight them, because their limbs were so long.  They may have been slow - they were walking around fairly slowly - but their reach more than made up for that.  I actually decided to call out for my mom, but I couldn't quite form the words.

That's when I woke up, calling for my mother.  I woke my roommate up.  I couldn't go back to sleep.  I tried to go through all the ways of killing them in my head, to put me at ease, but nothing worked.  They always survived.  Then I tried to put my mind onto completely different subjects, but there was always this creepy undertone to it, like they were around somewhere.  While I was awake I decided (hardly consciously) that they wanted to grab me, and then they'd devour me.

Eventually I fell back asleep, and slept the rest of the night.

I keep getting weird feelings whenever I go near my clock, though.

-p5

§ ¶Reacting Laterally

I was staring out into the dark abyss which is, the television when it's off, and I was reminded of something my mother always said.

Get home before the street lights are on.

I'll never forget that. Mostly because I never listened and heard it over and over, and over again.

Women are a lot like that. ... Uhhh... you know... home.. before the lights are off... but like, not listening.

Like... a door... isn't a jar.

I haven't done this in awhile. Man I suck.

-p2

§ ¶NayNay

I swear when I start to think I've got a girl figured out, she does something that completely blows my mind in all sorts of directions. Because it dosen't make any sense in my brain to leave your date at a concert the two of you went to, simply to go out into the parking lot with some person you don't know from Jim in order to do some drugs. And then when you're done with that you come back to said date for about 3 minutes, only to disappear without a word a minute later when his back is turned so when he returns to where you are, you're nowhere to be found. Nor are you to be found anywhere in the entire fucking venue. While he might stick around for a while to try to find you, he's for damned sure not going to spend the night sitting in the parking-lot waiting for you to come back from wherever you went. He will drive home with your belongings in his car, because it's late and he has to work in the morning.

Going out and getting the hookup I can maybe get, because whatever it's free. But to go back outside with said stranger instead of hanging around your date, makes no fucking sense. If you're that bored, please inform your date so you can end it there and both go your seperate ways.

Girls suck.
p3

§ ¶False Alarm

Eh, turns out that the barfly gets around a bit more than I'd like to be involved with. Cutting off connection attempts.

My ex is coming to visit on Tuesday. We'll probably do what we always do.

Play some Magic, then shag on the couch.

It's fun, it'll pass the time... I guess I even miss her a bit.

It just all feels a bit hollow.

-p4

§ ¶i hate to have to think, i hate feeling too

i have a myspace profile now. yay.

It makes me feel slightly thought of when people add me to it. Thankfully there is a new feature where you can put your top 8 people on the front.

I'm in no one's top 8. I wonder what number we'd have to get to to get to top 8? Top 293?

I think it shows us that we all need to try harder to be liked. In all ways.

Can I buy that slice of pizza for you? What level of friendship have I gained from this purchase?

I think life would be interesting with those little sim monitors on everyone. I bet there'd be a lot less lonliness and a lot more blurry sex.

-p2

§ ¶Confused

I can't figure out if this girl is messing with me or not.

Last week at the bar...
She was cold, so I lent her my shirt.
She was thirsty, so I bought her a drink.
She was having trouble standing up, so I got her a chair.
She wanted to go home, and no one would give her a ride, so I got her a cab.

Then she calls me up and asks me to give her number to this guy I'm chilling with. Whafuck?

Hear from her today, ask her how things are going with that guy...
girl: we aren't together
cent: Eh, I thought you two had hooked up or something
girl: no
girl: just hung out

Wondering if I have a chance with her... wondering if it's worth it...
wondering if SHE'S worth it.

I dunno.

Two of me might actually be worth something.
-p4... kcus slrig

§ ¶Bush packer

I am so tired, I think I just fell asleep while typing this.

It was a breif nap. I dreamed that I had found true happiness and then dropped it and watched it tumble in slow motion into a sewer grate.

That's life for you. In slow motion often.

§ ¶Addition makes things bigger

I am such a pack animal.  Whenever I go out, even to do something as mundane as buy shampoo, I always want to do it with at least one friend.  I don't know, maybe it's a sickness.

Oh, and girls suck when they have a boyfriends littered throughout the United States.  It seems like every time I actually meet a girl here, she has a boyfriend in New York or Vermont or California.  We are nowhere near any of those locals.  Man, that's a pisser.

-p5

§ ¶For the record

I totally whine.

And I think that part of my inate charm is to whine just enough before sounding like a broken recording of that raymond guy that everyone loves.

Why must everything be like x? Why!?

i with everything was more like y, or a x'd z.

-p2

§ ¶We What?

Dustin said:

email: junk@barbourcentral.com
message:
This site is terrible. The self-loathing poured onto this page is depressing and not at all interesting. Quit whining and get yourself a woman. News flash! All girls are looking for that special someone (to use a cliche). If she doesn't wanna eat steak and lobster with your work buddies, she doesn't like ya'. Women don't like whiners. They need someone who can protect and provide for them. So Stop whining!
date: 5:38 pm - Friday,September 23, 2005

I think you're missing the entire point of this site. We don't whine, we merely make observations about the women in our lives. Infact more than half of us are in successful relationships. Hell one's even married and has a kid, yet he still writes here. Simply because most of what we write isn't whining, whining is asking why no one likes us and why do we have to eat worms.

Pretty sure we've never done that. So really, next time you want to call us pussies, at least do your homework beforehand.

p3

§ ¶Not just like heaven

Every so often a girl does something that doesn't make her suck. Like going to a movie with you to see "Just like Heaven" and about halfway through it she twirls her finger and says "Come on director, lets' wrap it up."

I don't think I've laughed so hard at a movie in ages.

Sadly the director didn't wrap it up.

p3

§ ¶A post about everything and nothing

"She lost ten pounds and a lot of inhibitions." - Andy M.

I have been discovering recently how extreme girls are with appearances.  Not all, but some are just crazy.  "I have a stomach!  It's sticking out a little bit!  I didn't used to have that, but since I've gotten to college, it's stayed!"  Like, it must be completely flat to be satisfactory.  I mean, it seems almost obsessive.  And, I understand why - our society puts that pressure on them; I feel it to, though not as prominently as they do - but don't misunderstand, I feel it.  I'm not sure, though, if it's "society" or myself that is placing that pressure on me.  I suppose it doesn't particularly matter, as the end is the same.

Well, there's also the pressure to simply be healthy, especially in America today when so many people are unhealthy.  Or they're healthy in bad ways.  For instance, I was at the gym today pumping some iron, and I saw so many people who just had terrible form.  They'd either be using the machines wrong, or doing reps very, very fast instead of really slowing down and using every muscle you can.  I don't know.  It's sort of depressing going there sometimes.  But, I definitely feel good afterwards; and I train, too.  I've been doing a lot more training since I've gotten to college.  I'm really enjoying it.  But, I still need to learn that whole sword form.  I have a week.  I'll have to work hard this weekend. 

I'm terrible about thank-you notes.

Does that mean I suck?

-p5

§ ¶something soft that you can have a beat to

women are the things that will most make us sad in the world.

next will be sporting losses.

then beer being spilled.

-p2

§ ¶I'm the only one of my new friends that's single

There's a cute, Japanese girl a floor above me that's really nice and smart and articulate.

The best part?  She's totally not interested in me; she has a boyfriend.

Girls suck when they try to keep old relationships going when they go off to college so they can't meet great guys like me.

-p5

§ ¶She said I'm sorry

I think that our government, or system of being is severely flawed.

As well as parenting.

I'll go to a mall to buy something, and see a daughter with their mother, wearing almost nothing.

No matter the age.

Suck.

-p2

§ ¶That's what she said

She said talent is sexy.

Now, I don't think I have a lot of talent--I can play the guitar okay, but I can't sing very well.  But, apparently what I have sexy enough for girls to come knock on my door and ask if it was me playing that song, and subsequently asking if I wanted to hang out later; and, really, that's just fine with me.

-p5

§ ¶Full of nothing but lies

She had read what I wrote about my Easter Bunny analogy and she said she was full of caramel. After we had gone on a few dates she asked me again if I thought she was full of caramel or full of nothing? At the time I said caramel.

But as is every woman's way, she was really just lying the entire time and now that I look at the situation she's full of nothing. Because someone who's worthwhile will actually call you back when you leave a message instead of just "forgetting" to call you back. I don't care if it's even a call-back saying "Hey I'm gonna hang out with some friends over here," it's the thought that matters. Because if you can't call me back, then it means you obiviously don't give half a shit about me. It's just called being considerate, but I keep forgetting this is woman-kind we're dealing with here so obiviously they're not exactly considerate.

Girls suck because they always say they're full of caramel, but whenever they do that, they never are.

p3

§ ¶Friendly meeting..

It's not exactly good when the person you've been seeing off and on for a week and a half straight, and who you think you might potentially have something with decides that she's not sure if she's "comfortable" with going out to dinner at your bosses house with other employee's for a night of free steak and lobster. This of course after saying she wanted to meet my friends, and that she should give her roomate and her visiting boyfriend a night alone.

Oh right, I'm sorry. It's just that most of the people I know in this shithole of a state happen to be people I work with, and then one or two other people. So really, if you want to meet my friends that's the best place to do it.

Whoops, I forgot. Girls suck.

p3

§ ¶When a body catch a body comin' through the rye...

My big trouble is, I always sort of think whoever I'm necking is a pretty intelligent person.  It hasn't got a goddam thing to do with it, but I keep thinking it anyway.

~Catcher in the Rye, by J.D. Salinger

Sounds about right.

-p5

§ ¶It's almost that time..

I met a girl last night named Nealy [or maybe it was Nealey, I forget]. Either way I asked her if she was named after the famous Boston Bruins Cam Nealy, she wasn't.

Girls suck when they aren't named after famous hockey players.

p3

§ ¶Being Underrated is Overrated

I feel just a tad bit used.  So, I made out with this girl a couple times.  And that was all it was, and that was all it was supposed to be, and that's fine with both parties.  The thing is, I feel a little used because she was also sort of seeing this other guy - I don't know the details, and this is only a very minor thing, only slightly augmenting the feeling.  It's more like, well, the last time we made out, I made her come, and then she tuckered out.  That's fine - I'm not complaining.  But, then I won't get to see her again before she goes off to college.  Now, I'm not the type that says, "Okay, now it's my turn"--I couldn't care less if "my turn" ever comes.  I'm just not like that.  It's just that all these little things add up to me feeling just a little used.  Not a lot.  Nothing huge or dramatic.  Just a touch.  The last thing is - and this is the only reason I said the thing about the other guy - is that I sort of feel selectively not-seen; she's seeing a whole bunch of people, just not me.  A part of me says I just didn't ask to see her again soon enough.  And, really, that's probably what's happening.  It's not a big deal, I'll go on with my life, and I'll forget about this, or at least not care.  I hardly care now.

Just... I dunno, kinda sucks.  Whatever.

p5

§ ¶/whine on

So... I've had exactly one thing go right in the past week: a friend of mine came back from Beijing, and we trained like hell, and then he left for grad school.  That was good.  The rest of my life... not so good.

It's just... I mean, I was telling a friend who's going into her senior year, I have had a most excellently drama-free summer (this came up because, well, she hasn't).  Thing is, now I'm having some drama.  I guess everyone leaving creates drama.  And drama, as we all know, is teh suck.  Friends I thought were the best of my best have sort of taken shits on me.  "Yeah, I can squeeze you in for three minutes on Tuesday.  Yep, see you from 3:09 to 3:12.  Bye."  Great.  That does me a lot of good.

I suppose that I'm making too big a deal out of it - after all, I'm about to make a whole slew of new friends, and they'll have to get closer than the ones who're going away--if the don't, there's a problem.  Plus, I'll see most of these guys, if not Thanksgiving, then Christmas.  It's just sort of... well, I just feel shafted, as I almost always do in situations like this.  Not that I think I'm the bee's knees, I just overestimated my worth to these people.  Or so it seems.  And, yeah, that kind of hurts.

p5

§ ¶I'd Give You Everything If You'd Just Let Me Stand Beside You

"Could you do me a favor?"

"What's up?"

"Could you slap me in the face?"

"Wh...why?"

"It'd save us both a lot of time in the long run. I wouldn't have to waste time figuring out a way to ask you out, you wouldn't have to come up with an obviously fake excuse to blow me off, and we could get right to the slap that'd come right after I said something especially offensive as I prepared to leave."

"That's... well... wow.. that's pretty cynical. I mean, what if I said yes?"

"Ah, then we'd save even more time. While we'd miss out on the honeymoon period, we'd also be missing out on the long stretch where we despise each other, yet can't bring ourselves to break it off... and we'd skip over the cheating, the revelation of cheating, and the subsequent break-up. We might even be able to just blow off the whole post-relationship-hating of each other."

"Well, sounds like a good plan and all, but I think I have a better one."

And then she leaned over and kissed me.

-p4

§ ¶Get over, somehow, my Drama Queen

That's it.  I'm so sick of it.  I'm done.  I'm a drama queen, and I hate it.  It's dumb.  I wish that, every time I was being a drama queen, someone would walk up to me and say, "you're being a drama queen," and get me to shut up.  "THINK for a minute," and then I would and I'd realize it's totally chill.

Guess it's up to me to be that guy.  The one that tells me to shut up.  Self discipline tastes like Skittles.

-p5

§ ¶Been Thinkin' 'Bout You...

I've been thinking about Tuesday night.  I feel... I feel maybe sort of used.  Like I said before,  I have never seduced a woman--only occasionally blundered into one at the right time.  This seems to be completely right-place-right-time material.  It had nothing to do with me, beyond my willingness, and possibly a "nice guy" status.

Or maybe I'm just looking for attention.

-p5

§ ¶Wipe-out!

I slept through my alarm.  It plays music for a full hour, and I completely slept through it.

See, I went to a LAN party last night, to be a dork and hang out with some friends I'll see very little of for probably the rest of my life, and we stayed up all night playing games and talking.  And so, I was going to get a little shut-eye.  Just two hours, so it wouldn't be hard at all to fall asleep nice and early tonight.  So, I set my alarm for 12:00.  I didn't wake up until two.  Still shouldn't be that hard to go to sleep though.  I am wiped out!

-p5

§ ¶Third Time Round

Okay, I'll disclose.  Last night wasn't supposed to be anything out of the ordinary.  I was going to hang out with this friend of mine, who I've barely seen all summer.  I was really looking forward to seeing her and hanging out.  We both love classic movies (though she is much more well-versed than I), and so I thought Key Largo, the old Huston-directed Bogart/Bacall film would be a good choice, and, since she'd never seen it, and I'd only seen what turned out to be parts a long time ago, it turned out to be great.  I picked her up and we chatted on the ride over, and she showed me a couple neat little things she'd brought along (top 100 movie quotes that've been embedded into our culture, and a bit of a Jennifer Cruise novel referencing the Hammett book, The Maltese Falcon).  It was really nice just to talk, and hang out again.  It'd been far too long since we'd last really had a chance to hang for a while.  The last time we truly hung out being the morning after graduation, after we'd been up the whole previous night, in our philosophy teacher's portable.  That was wonderful.  I miss JR.

But I digress.  Well, after a bit, I popped the movie in, and we occasionally made a comment as it progressed.  She was leaning on the couch in such a way that I thought about possibly laying my hand on it, but I decided against it.  There would be nothing coming from me, this would simply be us hanging out (though there has been some sexual tension between us before, so my making a move wouldn't be out of the blue, mind).  Then, about fifteen, twenty minutes into the movie, I put my hand down on the couch right where I'd had it before - I thought - and what was there but her fingertips.  I reactively started to take my hand away, but her finger moving stopped me.  It is my opinion she moved her hand, and planned this.  I think she was being devious.

Well, we kept watching the movie, and our hands seemed to get more and more entangled.  Then, near the end, I took her other hand, and kissed it.  We held hands a bit longer, then I kissed her palm, and her hand stuck to my face.  That was just fine with me.  So I started kissing her fingers, and her wrist, and I was going to make it down to her elboe when my forehead touched hers.  It was turning into a not-just-friends thing anymore, but damned if I cared.  It was her move.  So, we kissed.  And then we missed the rest of the movie, the last ten minutes or so.  Then we kissed some more, and started making out.  Lots of fun.  The movie ran out, so, to keep the mood going, I put on Casablanca.  What a great movie.  Now, there's a movie I never imagined I'd be making out to.  At least, not on purpose.

So, we made out.  I view the event as basically inevitable; it had to happen, at least once.  That was just what our chemistry said.  And, as far as I know, it'll only be that once.  You see, I'm not all that worried about what happens next.  I see two options: either we go back to being friends like before, which I'd be more than happy with (and honestly, that's what I expect will happen - besides, she's a wonderful girl and a wonderful friend), or we make out some more.  A relationship wouldn't work, simply because it's so late in the summer, and we're going to different colleges next year.  It's simply not practicle - and we've talked about this before, though not exactly in this context, and both agree - to go into college with an attachment like that.  At least, not for us.  What of the various breaks in the school year, next summer, and if she transfers into my college, what then?  What of them?  They're things that I'm really not going to worry about, and will take step-by-step.  Unless we talk and want otherwise, I'm planning on, and prepared to, simply go on as being just friends.

That said, I'm glad we made out.  She was a great kisser, with wonderful lips.  I'll spare the other details, but she has a great body, and we had fun.

Here's to whatever comes next!

-p5

§ ¶On Second Thought

I was going to write something, but then realized she reads this.

Sweet dreams!  (P.S. I still have some of your hair in my mouth; I can't seem to get it out.)

-p5

§ ¶Anxiety Dreams

Last night I had a dream that my roommate was a chubby punk-rock singer with a short sort-of-mohawk from the country.  I think I'm starting to finally have anxiety dreams about college.

Humph.

-p5

§ ¶Girls + Beach + Makeout = ?

Girls don't suck when you can make out with them on a calm summer evening on the beach.

But unless you're making out with a girl on the beach on a beautiful summer night, then yes. Girls do suck.

p3

§ ¶Illegal

12, 13, 14, 15, 16

These are all illegal numbers!  Why are you searching for them?!  You are bad people!

This has been a public service announcement.

-p5

§ ¶Romantique

There's something romantic about smoking a cigarette.  There's nothing romantic about lung cancer.

I watched a slew of Bogart flicks recently, all noir, and damn if they aren't cool, and damn if he doesn't make smoking look like the cat's pajamas.  But, he also died of lung cancer.  That's not so cool.  Oh, well.  I guess it's one of those things that looks cool in noir films and hard-boiled mystery novels, but looks kind of dumb just about anywhere else.
-p5

§ ¶poopy!

I had written a whole post about orientation and registration and moving into a new phase of my life, but then my computer messed up and deleted it, so now I'm writing this instead.  Maybe I'll put something else on, when I want to put for the effort.  Until then...

Poopy!
-p5

§ ¶Hans island is greenland

I hate drama

-p2

§ ¶A New Record

Wow, I just took a cold shower, and that was the smallest my balls have been in days.  Did I mention how hot it is here?  I hate cold showers, but I felt all yicky from sweating like hell while sitting on my ass all day.  Bah.  Call me pampered; it's simply not what I'm used to.

And I completely second p2's entry just now.  I mean, we have one referrer not looking for porn.  Please, people.
-p5

§ ¶Stop the porn hits please.

I can't help but wondering how many people visit this site only to find that we do not cater to the over 50 demographic looking for pictures of girls tied to beds.

Women are absolutely insane, and that brings us an unending ammount of joy. If for only a few seconds we can ignore our own idiotic tendancies.

Girls suck!

-p2

§ ¶Hooooooooot!

My braaaiin is cookiiiiing!  Our AC has been broken for the last week and it's hot!  Like, wow, global warming sucks.  We had a fridgid winter, and now we have a sultry summer.  I've been acting weird lately.  I'm not used to being this hot this long.  Sure, I go places occasionally that are air conditioned, but I've been sleeping in heat.  Oppressive, degrading heat.  And, I'm not used to it.  My old man?  He grew up in Texas before air conditioning.  Me?  I grew up in Michigan, with air conditioning.  Different?  A bit.  Damnit, I'm not used to breaking into a sweat when I'm sitting down typing in my basement at home.  Grrr!  Whine whine whine.

Anyway, this really has nothing to do with how much girls suck.  Though, I suppose if "weather" were a feminine noun, it could be.  Hmm, this gives me an idea....

Tempestas (feminine Latin noun meaning weather) sucks!
-p5

§ ¶Nothing's Better

It's funny, when I was with her, I always sort of identified Ben Gibbard's part in the Postal Service song "Nothing Better" with me.  Now that it's over, I identify the whole song with our relationship.  Not to the T, of course, but somewhat similar.

But, then, I also identify the whole album with her, to some extent, because one time we played it straight through three times when we were making out; whenever we'd realized it'd stopped, one of us would reach and slap Play on her boom box, and we'd get back to business.

Ah, good times.
-p5

§ ¶Feeling Nietzschean

I have never seduced a woman--only occasionally blundered into one at the right time.

-p5

(Nietzschean not in content, but in how I said it: you know, aphorisms.  They're great.)

§ ¶life explained

man vs woman

tis funny

-p2

§ ¶Rap Lyrics Translated.

Lyrics:

And my jam knock in the Mitsubishi
Girls pee pee when they see me, Nava-hoes creep me in they tee pee
As I lay down laws like I lay carpet
Stop it - if you think your gonna make a profit

TRANSLATION:

I enjoy playing my music loudly on my car stereo. Apparently, women enjoy this also because they become sexually aroused when they see me driving. Oddly enough, when I visit the Native American reservations, some of the more sexually promiscuous Indian women attempt to seduce me in their homes. Their intent is to divest me of my earnings. Such actions are unacceptable.

From - This place, the one right here
-p2

Now with link working goodness.

§ ¶I wish I could remember all the things I know to be true.

I figure that if I keep pounding into my head what I know is true, some day it will stick.

One day I'll be able to recall on a moments notice all the things I wish to.

Or I'll continue to not be able to get out what I want to at the very moment I mean to.

At least there's always the bitter glow of the computer screen to lull me to sleep.

-p2

§ ¶John G. Roberts Jr. should not be on the supreme court.

There is nothing sweeter than a beautiful girl you never thought would be attracted to you, giving you a cute giggle.

Life should be a repetitive memory chamber of those moments.

-p2

§ ¶Karma

Sometimes, I figure so much bad karma is thrown at me, that I must be saving all my good karma for something really, really great.  And the longer nothing good happens to me, the better that thing will be.

At this rate, I'll come to own the second Titanic!

Wait... crap.

-p5

§ ¶So I Come to Grips with Something Else....

Sometimes, I find it very hard to come to grips with the fact that people who are inferior to me in every way imaginable have girlfriends; what's more, some of these girlfriends are beautiful.  Also, some of these couples are copulating; people who are inferior to me have had sex, and I haven't: that's hard to come to grips with.  Then I stop thinking about it, and the pain goes away.  (Not that I regret having graduated high school as a virgin; but, eventually, I would like to have sex.)

-p5

§ ¶and don't forget about the christers

best band ever. they are currently on the what would jesus fucking do tour.

they allow you to download their songs from their site, give them a listen. it's free, and god fucking wants you to.

unless you're homo.

the christers

§ ¶never been thawed

the best movie you haven't seen is never been thawed.

never been thawed

seriously. if you listen to only one thing i tell you, let this be it.

-p2

§ ¶jon stewart is funny

i was going to put something interesting in the this space but decided against it.

-p2

§ ¶Well, It's True

Isn't it kind of gross when you get into the shower and can't really tell because you're so sweaty already?

Ahh, I love bagua.

Oh, yeah, and, uh, girls suck, or something.

-p5

§ ¶bunny suicides

bunny suicides are funny

-p2

§ ¶awww, how sweet.

Love is a symbol of eternity. It wipes out all sense of time, destroying all memory of a beginning and all fear of an end. ~Author Unknown

-p2

§ ¶Twiddling my Thumbs

In the process of being stood up.

P.S.  It rocks.

Girls do, indeed, suck.

-p5

§ ¶a girl's guide to geek guys.

a girl's guide to geek guys

heh.... cute

-p2

§ ¶Muscle man, you look like a fucking freak.

Is there any question that America is full of too many assholes and idiots, and generally not a place for a nice person to live?

Driving around one of our great cities makes this clear pretty quickly.

Education is the answer to this dilemma. As well as personal responsibility. Not when it comes to money, but to your own intelligence and well being.

That's far more important than money. You need to learn for yourself. You need to find value in it.

I am perfectly fine with shipping all the assholes and idiots to another country. We can split it up north and south, however you want.

I'll take deleware. And if you can't learn to drive properly you are immediately kicked out of the state.

If you are so pathetic that you take your masculinity so seriously you feel threatened at the smallest inconveince?

Kicked out of the state.

We'll have a kickball tournament at the town square on every saturday. Hope to see you there!

-p2

§ ¶She's a Jar

I myself am in this weird position where I don't really want to date anyone, but I want sexual attention, but at the same time I don't; I just want to look.  It's very odd, I've never really felt this way before.  It developed when I was in England, where I knew all I would do is look; especially when... English girls might have one or two alright parts, but the rest is not so nice.  So, they might have a nice butt, or a nice form, but that's all (there are almost no cute faces).  So, basically, I'm going to keep on going like I was before I went: just go with what happens, and not worry about it too much.  Something that complicates this a little is that I might be able to hook up with anywhere between zero and five girls, but I don't really want to.

Besides, I have way too much on my hands already.  I need to study Ancient Greek and try to place into second year for college, finish The Birth of Tragedy as well as read some other Nietzsche, and train like crazy.  I need to get a lot stronger, improve my form and skills, and teach myself an entire sword form before the head of Yin Style Baguazhang comes to my hometown in September.  That may not sound like a lot, but it's a terrific amount.

Hmm... I think I'm going to go eat breakfast, then train some.  Then go to a classic car show today.  Fun fun!

(P.S. English girls aren't that bad, but it's more fun to exaggerate, since the English have a reputation for not being beautiful.)

§ ¶Everything Falls Apart

Well, I'd been working on several different females lately, but every single possibility fell apart over the course of a week.

Subject A:
Artsy little pothead. Cute, intelligent... hanging out with her one day and she gets a craving for some herb. So I call up a friend of mine that lives nearby and always has extra.. he comes over.. three days later he's leaving his woman for this girl. :/

Subject B:
Countryish good girl. Hit up the drive-in with her, got a complete lack of interest in anything other than friendship. :|

Subject C:
Slightly older employee of a shop I frequent. Good-looking, sane, friendly. Ended up hooking up with her coworker.

Subject D:
Went completely fucking batshit insane. Can't go into detail without making myself look even more insane. ;)

So I'm still living alone, not dating anyone, and at this point, I don't even have any women I know that I could consider trying to date. I'm stuck in a black hole, unable to escape.

-p4
Alive and Kicking. (for now)

§ ¶Night of the Ice Queens

Wow, I had two girls who I thought I was totally chill with completely do their Ice Queens on me tonight.  Really weird.  And I have no idea what I did.

Girls are wack.

-p5

§ ¶English Girls

Wow, it's great to be back in the States.  English girls... well, the English are not the post attractive of peoples.  Let me put it that way.  Now, I just got home last night, and it stormed and stormed, so I haven't made it out yet, but I plan on being absolutely blown away by the women here.  I'm also in a University town, which helps the number of beautiful women around, even in the summer.  It's good to be home.

(P.S. That's why I haven't posted the last three weeks: I was in London for two weeks, then Ireland for another, in Co. Kerry and Dublin.  But, that's for another post.)

-p5

§ ¶eating milk and cookies

one day i dream all of the world can end up co-existing like my first grade classroom.

as long as the milk is flowing, and the cookies keep coming, everything will be allright.

-p2

§ ¶it's sunday, so meh

Interesting google satellite maps

§ ¶A further clarification on what "serious" means.

I didn't realize how entirely skewed some girls thought processes are. I didn't think they were quite so bad as to say "serious" when [in her own words] "a relationship is so far down on the things I think are important, it's near the bottom."

Righto. Here I thought serious meant you made it a priority and wanted to focus on it somewhere near the top of the list of things that are important to you.

I guess in the future when a girl says she wants things to be serious I'll ask for a clarification so that I don't get confused anymore.

Girls suck.

p3.

§ ¶Serious != Commitment

A friend recently commented indirectly about me that she was happy I seemed to be happy. Which is slightly a misnomer. If you had caught me last weekend, I would've been happy. But as per usual in my situation, within the span of a week I have been able to go from happy, back to being bitter.

Why have I done this about face? Only because as per usual women, in this case one particular one, have been able to turn an about-face in what they say. When you ask someone what they want out of the possibility of a relationship with you and they say "Serious" which in my mind equals, big time commitment. Which in my book is fine and dandy, because I'm at the point now where I'm tired of stupid idiotic bullshit. I want to find someone who I'm comfortable with, and who's comfortable with me. Who I can joke around with, and not be worried they'll take something the wrong way. Apparently to a woman "serious" means she'll call when she feels like it, and if it's convienent to her schedule. It also means she won't actually call you back if you call her.

Needless to say, it yet again reaffirms the fact that the majority of women, suck.

p3

§ ¶Forgetful Nelly

Girls suck when they forget everything you told them on your first date. I'm not expecting you to remember everything, because I know I can't remember it all, but really when you ask me the same questions you asked on our first date it makes me think you're either

• Forgetful as a loon
• A lush who can't remember anything the next day
• Dumb

None of which are partciularly good things mind you.

But really I'm not asking for much, because I know I forget an awful lot of things, but I do at least attempt to remember things you said about yourself.

Then again part of me thinks it's a sign she's not that into me. But I'm not sure.

p3

§ ¶Doing it all over.

You can tell you really like someone when you feel like you're 13 years old all over again.

I just hope I finished all my social studies homework or Mr.Stipacevic is going to be mad at me.

p3.

§ ¶It's only the beginning.

Life's interesting when your original plans for the weekend were to see if someone would call you back to hang out, and instead turn into a date that went over-night and concluded with the two of you going to the batting cages.

Oh well I shouldn't necessarily say concluded since I'm making her dinner tonight.

Relationships are always good in the beginning. Now my goal is to make this 'beginning' last as long as possible.

p3

§ ¶1 - 1 = 0

She's not interested in dating anyone at the moment.  Damn.

This has been another installment in the ongoing adventurous failures of...

-p5

§ ¶It's all in the timing

Girls suck because the one you actually want to date, doesn't want a realtionship. But the one you don't really want because you don't feel anything for, is already calling you up 6 bajillion times a day.

Why is timing always so terrible?

p3

§ ¶Competition

And Competition rears its ugly head.  Turns out this other guy, who I know she's in to, is heading into town Tuesday.  And Monday is booked for her.  I leave for three weeks, and jolly old England, Friday.  This should be interesting... my time management in the next four days is so crucial it's crazy.  But, I can pull it off.  Confidence is key.

-p5

§ ¶4 - 3 = 1

Well, I've had an interesting few days.  Friday saw three dates, distributed neatly throughout the day.  Saturday saw a girl profess how much she wanted to be together.  It also saw another date.  On Friday, I was looking at three girls.  Through these various happenings, I've managed to narrow it down to one.  I know which girl I want to date.  One was ruled out because she was taken (that's the girl that told me that she wanted to be together, but she has a boyfriend.  "Timing's a bitch," as she said), another because she was taken, and really possessive (also taken by a best friend of mine, who's away), the third because she's leaving, and we wouldn't have clicked well together.  She was one of the most remarkable girls I've ever met, though.  I'll talk about her in another post.  My point is, I finally know who I'm going to pursue, full on.  It's a good feeling, after so many failed attempts.  I'm pretty sure I have this one locked solid.  But, of course, we shall see.

-p5

§ ¶Decisions

I was thinking about relationships as a whole and realized something. Sometimes you can be presented with two different potential relationships.

One with a person that makes you feel safe, that you enjoy their company and they yours. While there is no major spark, you still find them appealing to your eye. With them you feel like there's a certain "safety" in any relationship. That it'd probably go on for a while and be probably drama-free for the most part.

Then sometimes you're presented a realtionship that again you enjoy their company and they yours. However in this relationship there's a spark, or you definetly feel something when you're around them. You also realize that to make it "work" it'd require a helluva lot more elbow-grease and has the potential for a huge drama-bomb to blow up in your face.

The big question is, which one would you choose?

p3.

§ ¶Faygo breeds life into new circles.

I figure for every woman who wears tight clothing, and angel gets it's wings.

And for every teenager who wears tight clothing, and angel eats a puppie.

Please, think of the puppies.

-p2

§ ¶love and war.

I feel as thought sometimes women only pay attention to me because of my body.

No wait.. that's never happened.

Girls Suck :(

-p2

§ ¶shut up

mike.mg2.org

§ ¶Sometimes I hate having a conscience

Sometimes girls suck when they start to like you, only for you to realize if you continued dating them it would end terrible. Sure she's probably the hottest girl I would've ever dated, sure she's got an amazing rack. But the overall riding fact is she's 18, and a coworker. Oh and her mother works with us too. So while I would love for something to happen and could easily make something happen, the nice-guy part of me is trying to tell the other parts that we shouldn't do it.

Sadly the nice-guy seems to be winning.

p3

§ ¶Oh, well

It's really too bad that girl was taken already.  Because, if she weren't, she would be now.

-p5

§ ¶Being Nice

It's interesting how a far a few nice compliments can get you. Sometimes I end up saying them without even realizing it. That's not to say I don't mean them, because a lot of the times I do. But when they automatically come out of your mouth you can sit back and see how the person reacts when they hear them.

I think everyone just likes hearing nice things about themselves, and whenever anyone tells you a compliment you instantly change how you think of them. Because more often than not compliments don't come easily from people. As I'm figuring out if you want a woman simply tell her a compliment and she could be yours.

At least I didn't have to give her anything except a free compliment.

p3

§ ¶Almost in the same breath

I just got off the phone with my now-ex girlfriend.  We broke it off.  It's chill, it was completely mutual.  We'll remain friends, which shouldn't be that hard, considering we weren't exactly attached at the hip.  What's funny is that in the same call, using the same phone, her sister and I planned a date.  She was with one of my best friends, who recently moved to Beijing for the summer.

It's all very confusing, and also quite humorous.  Not that there'll be any bitterness or backstabbing.  That's something I'm absolutely not down with.  I mean, it's just us going out and having some fun.  Nothing serious.  One thing I don't plan on having with her is a relationship.  Or anything resembling that.

Here's to summer!

-p5

§ ¶A drive down ole memory lane

After school today, I ran into a girl who I've known since elementary school.  Apparently we used to hold hands in first grade.  At least, according to her.  Anyway, we started chatting, and she invited me to go hang with her some, as she was going through some rough times and wanted a guy to talk to.  So, I happily accepted.  We talked a lot about my old girlfriend, from last year, whom she knows as well.  We talked about our nasty breakup, the whys and wherefores, and all the rest.  Reason being, her boyfriend recently dumped her, after his character drastically shifted from neat to the "asshole guy" we've talked so much about here.

It was just an interesting experience, thinking about those old times and articulating some of my feelings to her.  I enjoyed talking with her.  I think, though, she hit on me a little bit (see the second and third sentences), which I'm really not down with.  Oh, well.  Only five more days of school, after all.

-p5

§ ¶Crocodiles are bigger

"Let me teach you a lesson, son.  What good will a beautiful girlfriend's body do you if she doesn't let you play with it?  Sure, other guys may covet her, but as soon as they find out she's a prude, that'll stop real quick.  So what're you supposed to do, huh?"

See ya later, alligator

(Look at it this way: our expectations for relationships simply don't match up right now.  It's the end of my senior year; I want to go out and have fun.  I want to fool around some [though I do expect to go into college with a V-Card], and she's not really down with either of those things.  Besides, it's mutual.)

-p5

§ ¶The Honeymoon-period

I love the beginning of a relationship, when everything is peachy-keen no matter what. Even if she tells you that that shirt you're wearing is god-awful ugly. It's cute in that "oh she's trying to help me look cooler" phase, as opposed to later on when it becomes "she's trying to change me into someone compeltely else". Or when she says that it's cute how you sing along to music in the car, which later becomes "There's a reason they get paid to sing in a band and you don't."

Girls suck because they don't stay in the first phase.

p3

§ ¶Operation Terminated

Girls suck when they cancel on you.  I had my day neatly planned out.  I was going to go out for coffee with one (a friend), and then go out to a movie with another (the girlfriend).  When I think all these plans will still work, a friend calls and asks if I want to hang out.  I decline, thinking that my day was pretty much booked.  Then the first girl cancels.  Her family went out this morning, and they got back later than she thought they would.  Fine.  Then, the other one cancels.  She sucks.  She cancelled on me yesterday, too.  Now I can't get ahold of my friend again, so it looks like I'll be spending the night at home.  Well, reading a book isn't bad.  But, it isn't going out to see Unleashed with my girlfriend.  Or jamming out with a buddy.  Or whatever.

Grrr.

-p5

§ ¶Sports and girls

Often times girls are like sports. Sometimes a girl will make you think that you have it 'in the bag', that she's totally into you, and you're totally into her. Only at the crucial moment to get denied. Not only do you get denied time and time again, but every time she denies you simultaniously she gives hints she's still into you.

So you're stuck in a Catch-22, trying to go after her, and yet being rebuffed everytime you do so.

But then sometimes when you think you have no hope of pulling things out with a certain someone, by some random pure blind dumb luck you end up together. It sure as hell didn't seem like it was going to happen, but it did.

I hope the next girl I meet turns out like Arsenal's suprise win in the FA Cup yesterday, against all odds I end up with someone who's awesome in every regard.

p3

§ ¶Sorry I'm Sleepy

A girl who I really like just got broken up with.  She's a good friend, and I like her a lot; in fact, I wouldn't mind dating her at all.  My relationship also seems to be winding down, but we'll see what happens with that today.  I'm also going out to get coffee with this other girl today.  This should be an interesting day.

-p5

§ ¶david cross the street now, you wanker.

Right now there are over a billion women who you will never get to sleep with.

-p2

§ ¶A hero the rest of my life

I feel as though my entire life has been built towards a single defining moment where all my dreams come true.

And until then, there's women.

-p2

§ ¶Love and Cereal

I think love is more like life than cereal.  With life, I feel that if I knew exactly when I was going to die, I wouldn't enjoy it nearly as much.  That's part of the wonderfulness--its sponteneity.  Cereal, however, has an expiration date.  And I'm going to get as much out of that damned cereal as I can before it expires!  But, I think that, if I were in a relationship, and I knew exactly when it would end, I wouldn't enjoy it as much.  That sucks.

Coincidentally, girls suck.  (But don't worry, I'll figure out how to pull a curve ball on her.)

-p5

§ ¶a fatal flaw in the logic of love.

feeling bad about yourself sucks. taking it out on the one you love sucks more.

i still dream of being an olympic tap dancer.

ever watch tap dancers?

I never really wanted to put forth the effort, but i wanted the attention.

I want to be a tap dancer. and a black belt in karate. and a great musician.

i just don't wanna actual do any of those things for a prolonged period of time. can you be good at reading?

I'm an olympic reader.

-p2

§ ¶growing up

being a parent is changing your attention from girls in short skirts to your daughters smile.

that and getting fat.

-p2

§ ¶segmentation fault

I was looking at a girl with beautiful blue eyes and wondering what it would be like to be her boyfriend.

It would probably be like being anyone elses boyfriend, except the view would be nice while being yelled at.

-p2

§ ¶twenty two amish gentlemen

I figure that in my life time I will have had about 5,000 insane arguements on a given topic.

4,600 of those will have been with women.

The other 400 will be me rambling incoherantly to myself when I'm 75.

-p2

§ ¶a key to the center of the universe

I drive a white ford bronco and sometimes I pretend like I'm oj.

-p2

§ ¶questions in space

Scientists have discovered that a girl left alone may like you, but several of them together and your chances generally decreases.

The study also finds that 84% of statistics are made up, and that I had no where to go with this.

-p2

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